Open

Asshole - Incessantly a fucking clown, "Hello children, it's me !  Asshole the Clown.  With my fabled fucking sidekick, Fistey !"

Fistey - Because a sock is a sock, "Hello assorted box of delicious humans. today we're going to learn a valuable lesson."  ... Looks to asshole, he takes a drink.

Asshole - "What ?"

Fistey - Furrows his sock-brows suspiciously and returns to the camera.  "And that ... valuable lesson ... comes in the form of ... "

Asshole - Smashes the bottle, "A fucking chainsaw you demonic son of a bitch."  Foot down on the back, he pulls the cord and picks it up.

Fistey - "I Knew it !  You were hiding a chainsaw this whole time !  ...  Asshole."

Diver Deep the Second

 
"But there was a trial.  It was the twilight of the gods."

 

From her stone at Har-Megiddo's edge in the late eve, the Maiden of today watches the investigators walk away.  The field clearing, dust settling, sullen losses walk their ways from Sanctuary's gates to the keeper's gate.

 

She stares after the high flying wind dragons, then a sideways glance from the Queen of the Sidhe, mistrust.  The maiden smiles back to a grunt from the queen before she mounts her dragon.  

 

Amazon bikers roar past with looks upon her with concern ... all cleared in time's end the Maiden stands, stretching her arms high in joy, a cracked back and a laugh at it.

Maiden - "Freedom."

Laughter spinning before gone in a dervish.

A distance away through the sandy mist, the metallic slats at the fore of Boadicea's chariot unfold, she falls from it to her knees in exhaustion. 

Her two archer daughters follow the same from the sides of the fore plates, staring coldly.  She looks to the eldest, the eldest looks back, a nod.  

 

The daughters turn to the chariot and tear Boadicea's armor violently from it in chunks twisted off.  They rip their own armors from their placements and slam them into the structure, slats absorbing their form to two.

 

The eldest steps into Boadicea's place on the chariot as the youngest stretchers her arms to become the fore, the heads of falling kings dragged behind staring, their ghosts staring alike as the chariot's steeds.

They throw the daughter's bow. 

Boadicea kneels, a sad smile, a tear.  She holds the bow and twisted armor pieces to her chest, head bowed as they stare.  A quiver lands before her, arrows dumping.  She slumps in tears gathering it.  A sword.  A dagger.  Waterskin.  

She gathers in sobs as the chariot turns away into the dust.

She falls back, scattering it.  The sun passes, she lay on her back staring, hard breathing.  Clouds pass in shapes.  The sounds of the real world traffic starts to fade in, from the plains in farmer fields today.

"Boadicea."

She looks.

Maiden - From the spinning sand settling, "We're free !  On the very same day !"

She rolls over away in her tears clutching her gear.

"Boadicea"

She controls to a heavy breathing.

The sound of a car driving by.

Maiden - "The dead abandon you.  It means it's time to live again.  It means you're free."

Boadicea - "i know."

________________ 

 

Felicia stares from the open house side into the backyard, Hector and Sally very badly damaged, rockets missing and tail blown off.  UFO peeps it's head behind Hector.

Felicia - "What are you ?  What happened to ... this ... ?"  She runs a high hand across the broken wing.

The UFO drops to wheels and zips through the bushes and off over the golf course to away.  After a stare, Felicia looks over the damage, feeling over the charred out gaps along Sally's hull.

Felicia - Stepping back, "This is bad."  She looks up at Hector's top.  "Isn't it."

~ As they leave Uranus ( ... ) ~

 

Sally - "I can't believe those two showed up at the arena."

 

Hector - "I know !  Check it out, I made a little ring out of mine."  He pulls out an arm and shows the golden ring with the belly-disc on top, body crushed around his finger.

 

Sally - "Ha !  Mine's a thimble."  She pulls out an arm, a finger with a blue and white thimble, silver cap.

 

Hector - "Wow ... hey can I ... "

 

 

 

The Princess Gunship (shut up) ports out behind them, spinning them off in the reverse vacuum of entry.

 

 

~ The Continuing Adventures of Diver Deep ~

 

Evil - Squelching into their internal speakers, "Youuuu ... Where ... is the Nocturnal One ?!"

Hector - "Ummm ... who ?"

 

...

 

Evil - Not impressed with acting skills, "Really ?" 

The aliens sigh and shake their heads in their seats behind her.

Sally - "Run."

They blast for the asteroid field, the gunship barreling through behind.  The side cannons mounted to the heavy fore track their pursuits until they cross the gunship bow.  The main cannon lights through the stony field, sending shards of debris across their path.

Side cannons hit as they try to avoid the pelting shower (the aliens high five), the ship grinds into a turn sending a wide beam across their path and through the field.

 

~ The Nocturnal Ones ~

 

(back  in the yard)

 

Hector - "It's bad."

...

Felicia - "Okay."  She pulls the phone on her front where a schoolbus of insane children pulls up creaming from its windows.
________

Walking through the desert, a car roars by, leaving the real world farms in place of Har-Meggido.  another, it's the desert again. 

Boadicea's twisted piece armor looking as awesome as intended, the maiden skipping from dervish to form around her in nearly a dance.

Maiden - "Boadicea ... "

...

Boadicea - "What."

Maiden - "Do you have any food ?"

...

Boadicea - "No.  And if you must keep mispronouncing my name, please just call me Buda.  It's ... what they used to call me."

Maiden - "You mean like the ... "

Buda - "No."

...

Maiden - "Oh." 

...

(hunger sound)
________

Outside the school where the kids all run in circles for the door, some missing and running into the wall.  Felicia talks on the phone while off in the background one tries jumping through a closed window and bounces off again and again, children inside cheering him on.

Agent Geneva - "I got the message.  But you should know I'm not the kind of agent you think I am.  We've settled them.  And yes we can help you.

"And then we settle your parents."

Felicia - "Ah.  So ... you're the kind of agent who settles children's parents."

AG - "In some certain situations in which we have purveyance, yes.  I'm the kind who settles it all.  But we keep them locked down for now.  And you."

She hangs up annoyed looking up at the bus. 
________

Agent 'Geneva' puts away the phones the repair and construction crews set to work and continue arrival, repair braces being constructed around Hector and Sally. 

Agent Geneva - To another agent standing alongside, "I hate kids so fucking much."

Agent Blank - (jogging tracker) "How long ?"

AG - "Until we find out if she's worth filling a tube.  Or not."

...

Blank - "I hate those fucking gigs."

AG - Looks at him smiles, then turns for the work crews.  Points up toward Hector, "Mixed opinions.  We need this, you need that, and they need these operational.  So let's get hop, hop, hop on ... to it."  Turns walking.

...

Blank - "Hey !"

AG - Turns stopping, "Yah."

Blank - "What about Sanctuary ?  You know they protect their students over all."

AG - "We need an agent there.  And we need that agent aware, of her operational environment.  Just like the last one was."

Blank - "The last one betrayed you."

AG - "Did she now ?"  Smiles, looks back to Hector, at the agent again, then turns back to it.
____________

Another car roars past in the desert.

Maiden - "It's just ... I didn't know I would get 'hungry'.  It isn't really something you'd think of ..."

...

Boadicea - "Me neither."

Another car roars past.

~ two

Maiden - "Oh.  Well ... we're all different of course and our whatevers are usually about that.  Usually we leave to go mate and then return but I'm really ... I'm just not interested in that right now.  But sometimes we rebel.  And then we hunt them."

Buda - "Hunt them ?"  

Maiden - "Yes.  The circle cannot be broken.  That's what I want to do.  I want to break it.  They think it's to mate so I'll just come back when I kill him, but I lied."

Buda - "You lied to the fates."

Maiden - "Well only two out of three ..."

Buda - "And they're going to hunt us when they find out."

Maiden - Excited, "Yes !  All the gods shall hunt us.  The ones that are left anyway.  It could have been worse but That's why I found you !"

Buda - A sigh. "We need food."

Maiden - "I said that."
________

Felicia drags from the schoolbus noise again, into the house while the Karen neighbor with the tiny dog watches, slowly raising her phone.  

The Princess Gunship drops from the sky, crushing her leaving the dog pulling on the chain before the eyes go wide at the sound of the ramp opening.
________

Inside, Felicia to Grandma Great on the computer.  In the back ground, granpa tells a story to some 'old Italian Gentlemen'.

Man - "And so I stuck 'im.  Real slow.  Slid right in and left it there ... and then I flicked the handle.  Just one time."  Small agreement and nods.  "And I stuck 'im again.  And I wiggled it a bit.  Like maybe it was stuck on a rib !"  

 

Some laughs and clinked glasses.

 

Man - "And then I gave a turn ... know what I mean.  Didn't like the fella.  So I pried some rib."  A single cheer and some nods of understanding.  "And then ..."  He leans in, they lean in ... "And then ... I shot him."

Breaks the tension with a "Whoo !" and a shot in the air, followed by a hail of cheers and Tommys.

Grandma - Turning back to the screen, "Oooo I was there for that one ... bitch did have that coming."

Felicia - ... "No doubt."  Distracted by the doorbell ... "Hang on."

__

She opens the door, looks up, eyes go wide.

__

Felicia - Running past the screen, "Aliens !"  Runs past again, "Help !"  Again now chased past by two aliens saying 'Whoop whoop whoop' and Evil with a baseball bat shrieking "Where is the Nocturnal One !?"

 

 

( ... and they all bop side to side in their cars ... ) 

Mom drives while dad loads a shotgun, brother checks the slingshot.

Behind the man drives while the maiden loads, Mafioso in the back seat, all as old as the tale.  Long lines of black cars filled with more file from the flowered Sicilian alleyways.  Stock film noir footage of long alleyways and shootings seen through the cars' windows.

 

The maiden dials her cell.

 

~ house chase, the windows are boarded.

A man's eyes go wide in Mexico, pockets his phone, lights a blunt.  

 

Armored SUV's with gun strapped men on the sides, followed by a white Toyota pickup truck with anti-air in the back (IYKYK).  Footage through the windows of horseback charges from period Mexican westerns.  

 

The lead car's passenger (blunt guy) dials his cell.

~ house chase, the doors are locked.

A man's eyes go wide in LA.  Low-riders bounce through the streets.

~ An alien takes a skillet to the face.

The front car from LA splashes its front into the water.

 

Dots on the map converging (it's not realistically timed).  Stock footage of battleship formations and vacation sailing.  Her mother's enraged eyes as she drives skidding water from the sides ...

The front door to the house blows open from the outside, Felicia runs out screaming ~

Felicia - "Aliens !  Help !  It's too fucking much !"  

 

She runs past the crowd while they stare after ...

The all turn back and draw on the house, opening fire for a very long time until rubble.  Evil stands hunched breathing hard, glaring, trembling with rage, baseball bat splintered.  An alien pauses bandaging skillet face.  He shakes his head slowly, taps his wrist-comp, whistles and points for them to turn around.

They do.

The Princess Gunship hovers pointed over them, barrel the size of the entire cul-de-sac.  They turn back to Evil and the Aliens ( ... is that a band ?), they're gone.  

 

Back to ship.  

 

Gone with a gust

They curse and throw down their guns ... as they start to disperse and mingle, Felicia's mother spots Agent Geneva looking inconspicuous among the crowd and approaches.

AG - Shitty grin, "Ah ... if it isn't 'Miss ... "

She punches through his face holding a chunk of his brain behind him.

~ Crowd response ...

She pulls it back through as he drops.

~ Crowd response ...

She peers into the mass in her clenched grip ...

Mother - "Stay the Hell away from my daughter."  Crushes it.

~ Crowd ... responding and then walking away now.

Felicia - "Here ya go Grandma Great."  She hands her five bucks.  "Happy birthday."

Maiden - "Ha !  I'm gonna go buy some candy.  Right now.  Wanna come along ... ?"

Felicia - Smiles, "Yeah."

 

~ the end ~

Interlude

Fistey - Sock-punching and trying to hold back the chainsaw hand, "Why ?  Why couldn't I read your mind ?"

Asshole - Leaning over with an evil in his eye even greater than a sock's, chainsaw edging closer to his own hand in it, "Drunk."  Maniacal eyes leaning in closer ... "Could be joining AA tomorrow though."

From behind the camera - "Um.  Is this scripted ?"

Both with a glare, "Fuck off."

 

Caldera reckoned

~ two

Close

The chainsaw roars ...

Asshole - Press close to the sock-hand with the blade as it slips around trying to stop it at the base.

Fistey - "You ... haven't ... got ... the guts you ... fucking clown."

An intern walks up to the camera man filming in horror, she looks herself, "Oh my god.  So ... the boss is distributing these NDAs ... "  She looks closer ... "Is this ... is ... is this ... ?"  Shakes it off, "For some reason."

They both stare as off camera ~

Asshole - Shrieking in pain and laughter as the wet sound starts, "I WIN You Son of a bitch !  I !  Fucking !  WIIIIIIIN !"

As the saw-blade sound chunks on the bone, they're sprayed with blood as the room shakes with what sounds like the death roar of a thousand demons losing a million souls, punctuated by her scream.

~ the credits ~

The Diver Deep Karen's toes curl up into the cracked concrete from the gunship's landing, her dog pulling at the leash until finally it snaps, song returns from 4:40

A cat is thrown screeching through a home window.  Three dogs jump out.  They walk the middle of the street, a group mobs a home owner and mailman when the door opens for a delivery.  More dogs escape, one goes back for the package.

Dogs trying to work the mail-truck.

Greater and greater numbers they roam the streets.  A mob through a grocery store footage, panicking customers and clerks.

Dogs run the truck into a pole, high fives inside.

They walk the middle of the road with steaks and dragging sausage links to the countryside.  Cars swerve in desperately to avoid them, exploding in ditches.  A sheep-dog peeps his head.

They walk, shepherd dragging a wide eyed sheep by the foot.

A wolf pack watches from the woods, look at each other, shake their heads then back into the shadows.  A young one looks back to their departure and lowers his head with a grin before slinking off to to join in the street.

Into the dusk and down the road, the huge pack struts.  The mail truck swerves behind, pit-bull's jaws clamped to the fender, the sky goes black with night.

~ after the credits and in the dark ~

Sally - " 'Just hold real still and maybe they won't notice us sounded like the worst plan ever."

Hector - A laugh.  "Yeah.  Humans are fucking insane."

 

Sally - "I think those were aliens."

 

...

 

Hector - "Figures."

Thine EXO-Tale ~

~ Immediately follows Diver Deep the Second ~

As they leave the scene, cars filing out from the cul-de-sac, drivers reloading, normal shot tired as the sun goes down ... people in their houses prepare for sleep, tucking in, eyes close and all are gone but the white Toyota with a yellow stripe, left sitting in the middle of the street.

When all is quiet he stands up to a robot (old school chunky part changes), the anti-air over his shoulder.  He looks around ... the last of the lights go out, a few more cars standing along their street.  Disco balls rise slowly from their hands while they watch near religiously and then, they start to dance.  

 

And all the cars jump up, every single one joining in.  Through all the quiet streets not some but all the cars left empty leap up for the party.

Inside Persephone's Fleetline, a hand passes Saffron (sunglasses on) a blunt.  In their path all the cars drop again to their wheels, appearing all normal around them as they pass through the city til gone, cars leaping up to dance again in their wake.

Under traffic overpass as they exit to, the robots dance with the people in the streets.  Down the way a norm is called and all back to wheels until gone again.  They party til the rising sun, slumping tired back down as the humans start to rise.

The last the white truck with the yellow stripe overlooking all.  He turns to the camera and puts up a finger ~ 

"Shhh ..."  Smiles and winks before back to a truck and driving away.